There’s no such thing as some of us being emotionally strong while some other being emotionally weak, unlike physical strength. First, we need to understand the truth that we all are made to be emotionally strong. Some of just don’t realize that and misinterpret themselves. When we feel the need and necessity, we act upon it with emotional strength and we all know such situations in our lives where we responded with so much of fortitude. Surely there will be such instances where we surprised ourselves. Where do we get such emotional strength out of the blue? it’s because you created a strong will to be so and it happened so.

Such situations that demand us to show emotional strength, we need to apprehend certain things and sort out some other things. You need yourself the most in these times to help get out of it. You must and can help yourself.

1. Acceptance

We read and heard several times that accepting the situations, lets you relax and stay at peace. But what’s more important is how you create such acceptance? For everything, there are always two roads at your disposal, one that’s not to be taken and the other, which is optimal to be taken. How you do it is always more important than what you do.

When things take an ugly turn, we all accept it because we have no other choice. But what really makes the difference is how you accept the situation. One person accepts it in a negative light by blaming himself all the time and one accepts it expecting something good even out of the worst situation. This one simple thought difference is the game changer here. That faith alone helps you stay intact emotionally. Otherwise, one would be broken emotionally until the good times show up.

Ergo, you must always see things in a positive light. Because it is so always. There is always something good in every situation. You may not know what it is but believe me, there no situation that does all bad to a person. I know how difficult it is to cultivate positivity in an adverse situation, but it is only when you do a difficult thing you will achieve an impossibly good outcome. Envision the good things you wish to have and keep moving forward.

2. Let your thoughts freely flow

Don’t fight back your thoughts, the more you fight it the more those thoughts pressure you. Let them freely flow. Every thought that comes to you, let them in and reason it with your conscious mind if that particular thought is true or not. For example, you happen to have a thought like, “why am I so bad at everything?” Now, don’t just try not to think about it, let that thought into your mind and reason deliberately with it why you are not bad at everything. Your mind believes you.

You must choose your thoughts carefully for good mental health and when it gets difficult to do so (it happens in adversities), you must at least try to reason those unwanted thoughts and restore the confidence in yourself.

3. Trial and error

The ‘EFFORT’ to change things is super important here. Certainly, you won’t succeed in your very first attempt itself but gradually, you will figure it out. ‘Practice makes a man perfect’, heard of this? Yes, it’s relevant here too. If not plan A, plan B. If not plan B, plan C. Your trials to figure out which way works best for you should go on until you make it.

And on the day when you figure it out, you can look back and connect all the dots and see how every single trial of yours add up to your end result. Starting from your first attempt, nothing goes to waste. In the end, every single thing you did makes sense and show value.

4. Alone time

Have some alone time. I said alone time, not to be/think you are lonely. There’s a huge difference. During the times of mental break down, it’s needed to have some alone time to energize yourself again. Talking less, thinking less, acting less. It might sound bizarre but they’ll help you get rejuvenated. You need to work on yourself.

5. Try new things that excite you

This comes under the same category as ‘Efforts’ but specifically, try to do new things, like a hobby, learning a new language, etc. I remember trying to learn Spanish when I felt down and it gave me new energy to survive through the troubling times. It’s great to take up a new hobby to change the vibe. All I’m trying to say is it’s essential to keep trying to snap out of that phase, giving up on yourself does not help you much.

6. Sort out your thoughts

Be it regarding a career situation or a personal situation, don’t let your thoughts get mixed up, it’ll only further baffle you. Take some time and sort them out. Things like, “what’s your priority now? If the current situation needs any action from you? If there’s any other alternative?” Should be thought over. Not to confuse yourself but to clear things out.

If you’re still confused, ask the advice of someone you feel comfortable with. Don’t worry about showing this side of yours to others, we all have such stuff, you are not the only one.

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7. Make reasoning with yourself

Only you can understand your mind and thoughts well. You are the boss of your mind and it listens to everything you say and believes you too. A person tends to show emotions without any effort, it comes naturally. When you face a situation, your subconscious mind tells you to react in a certain way without much of a thought. For suppose, when you face competition, you automatically feel nervous and when the opponent is strong, you feel intimidated. It’s not like you try to feel them, right? It happens default.

Such times, you have two options to choose from. One, to give in to such thoughts or two, to bring your conscious mind into the picture and tell your mind the more trustable truth. When your default subconscious mind tells you to be intimidated, listen to your conscious mind telling you it’s not the case. We must choose who we listen to.

At first, it might feel forced but eventually, it becomes a habit and you will come to see how impactful it is to reason with your mind when in a conflict situation.

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8. Take some time off from your routine work

It’s draining to do the same routine stuff every day, so take some time off. Do whatever your heart feels to do. We need a breather once in a while. Don’t get too busy surviving through the hustle of the day and forget living. See things on a lighter note for some time until you get out of the stress. Nothing comes before our mental well-being.

9. Write down your feelings

Don’t keep everything to yourself and find a way to express, whichever way you are comfortable. Some ways would be:

• Write it down on a paper
• If you are a God-believer, then pray and express yourself.
• If you have someone you believe, lean on them.
• Talk to yourself. Reason with yourself.
• Physical workouts. It is supposed to calm your mind quickly.

We need to let out the feelings that burden us to refill mind with new and good thoughts. You can’t put anything into a bowl full of sand to the brim. You have to clear it out first in order to refill with something else.

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10. Stay away from emotionally abusing yourself

Bad situations turn worse when you start blaming yourself. Refrain from doing so. There are a lot of things that are not in your control and you are only a human. Don’t think you are responsible for everything. Even if something happened cause of your mistake, it’s fine as long as you know it and you try to make it right. We tend to make mistakes and learn from them. Blaming yourself alone won’t make anything change, you must work on the situation and turn it better. So don’t be hard on yourself.

When you feel down, everything seems surely like a big deal but it might be as you think. The day you snapped out of it, you will think “ah, why did such a thing burden me so much before?”

So… That’s all. These are a few things you should be taking care of when you feel down. Take it easy! We all feel that way more often than we admit. It’s not something to be embarrassed to go through it. It’s something that makes stronger and wiser. Stay cool with it.

Lots of LOVE,

Nikki.